Ahhh Ooooo...

Werewolves of London!

Happy Halloween--enjoy your weekend!

Guess What!

Guess! No really, what might it be?

Give up?

OK, I'll tell you.

Another homeschool conference presenter has dropped out who was also going to do five workshops. Ha! Cosmic joke on me.

Could be worse--could be rainin' (Name that movie)

When you have 10 workshops all lined up, don't be jaded and take that for granted--it could all go away like this *snaps fingers*. Appreciate what you have. Be thankful.

Because it's Thanksgiving, here's Alice's Restaurant.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving and don't get busted for litterin'...

PartI



Part II



Part III

The Fourth

The Fourth

by Shel Silverstein

Oh

CRASH!

my

BASH!

it's

BANG!

the

ZANG!

Fourth

WHOOSH!

of

BAROOM!

July

WHEW!

Happy 4th of July everyone! Enjoy your freedom. Enjoy your families. Enjoy the loud fireworks and the corn on the cob and the grilled something or other.

Hold on tight, as you spin too fast on the tilt-a-whirl. Try not to hear the tinkling sound of nuts and bolts being jerkily shimmied out of rides at the carnival... Some of those are redundant any way. It's fine!

Hey, are we ever leaving Iraq? What do you think?

Because of the nuclear threat, must we really recognize the corrupt Ahmadinejad in Iran and continue to speak to him, thereby legitimizing his fraudulent election victory?

Life is complicated.

Let's just have fun today and enjoy our kids marching in parades, or watching parades and enjoy the summer fun of the 4th.

Happy 4th everyone!

Hey, Dick Cheney--Yeah You!!

Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

You can't get out of the fact that you were one of the chief architects of torture. Or, to rephrase it in your language, enhanced interrogation technique.

If there are any prosecutions, and by God there should be, you are at the top of the list.

So, STFU right now.

(Sorry to speak in such blunt terms on Mother's Day...)

Happy Mother's Day everyone!

Earth Day...Wait, That's EVERY Day!

I have a bit of a problem with Earth Day. While I think it's good to raise awareness and hopefully bring into people's consciousness the idea that we are connected to the earth and responsible to it, I still have a problem with how it is celebrated and why it is celebrated.

Every day is the earth's day. Every day we could be conscious of our connection to Nature and to be mindful of our place in it. To celebrate the earth on one day, and then possibly go back to buying things we don't need, and driving our gas guzzling hummers and giant SUVs, strikes me as being ironic and a bit obscene.

Earlier this week, a friend of ours recently went to buy a new washing machine--theirs was broken and irreparable. They went to an appliance store and were greeted with a presentation of animals from a nearby nature preserve--snakes, turtles, etc. It was great fun for them and their kids. They also got pins that the store was handing out showing how the store was celebrating Earth Day.

IRONY ALERT! *woot* *woot* *woot* *alarm sounds*

Do you hand out a thing to celebrate Earth Day?! A thing that will advertise your store, but that no one will wear, because kids don't really relish the marketing efforts of local appliance stores, and it will be quickly discarded and therefore it will end up in a landfill tout de suite.

I don't like when companies try to green their products or their marketing. It's cynical and false.

Instead of giving you a thing, I'm going to celebrate Earth Day today with you now by showing you the robin nest building going on in my backyard. Nature at work.

Look:

A robin is trying to build a nest on top of our completely ignored bird house at our living room window. A house with a pitched roof...

Wow. That's a lot of material up there.

But, not much of it is wedged behind. Do you think it will slide off?

Uh oh...

See all of those dried grasses in the center of the above photo with a green leaf on top? That all used to be on top of the birdhouse. Hopefully, the birds will try again and it will work out this time...

Yep, they are trying again.

Hey, that's looking better.

It looks like there's more plant material wedged between the window and the back of the birdhouse. That ought to keep it from slipping off this time.

Hello green canoe without an opossum living in it! Currently...As far as we know...

You should be proud, robin. That is a fabulous nest you've built. Take a bow, or stand there while I quickly try to get a photo of you.

Look at that nest! Look at all of the mud you've added--very stable. That's not going any where.

Are there any eggs yet? Let's take a quick peek, while you are off somewhere else.

No. No eggs yet, but we will check whenever you and your mate aren't around, so as to not freak you out.

Nicely done, Mother Nature. Beautiful work, robins.

Happy Earth Day everyone!

Easy as Pi Day!

Happy Pi Day tomorrow everyone! Whoo!! 3.14159 26535...yadda, yadda, yadda out to several thousand, millions really, and beyond... Pi doesn't end. It just doesn't. It keeps going and the digits do not repeat in any kind of pattern.

Wait, what? Yes, you heard me.

It just seems random and arbitrary, but pi is not. It is exact and applies to all circles regardless of size.

If you multiply the diameter of a circle by pi, you will get the measurement of the circumference. There is a constant relationship between the diameter and the circumference of every circle and it is expressed by pi. If you take nearly 3.1459, or pi, diameters of any circle, you will get its circumference. Amazing.

I can't teach my kids about how mathematicians go about finding the digits of pi--must look into that. However, I do have a great series of story math books, that explain some math concepts including pi.

Tomorrow we will again read, Sir Cumference and the Dragon of Pi, where Sir Cumference's son, Radius, will save him using math!! His mother, Di of Ameter shows up sometimes too. These Sir Cumference books are a kick. The stories are set in Medieval England and feature castles and dragons and knights all the while demonstrating different math concepts.

So, we'll read that book and then we will make pie to celebrate pi! Chocolate pie to be exact. My kids don't know about that and will flip when they do find out. Shhh. Don't tell.

Happy Pi Day this March 14th, that's 3/14--get it? 3.14. See?

Go get some pie and celebrate.

That's good pi.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! I hope you are either with the people you love today, or you're doing something you love today. Either way, it's still all about love...

The homeschooling Valentine's Day party was a huge success. The kids delivered valentines to each other's decorated bags.



Let's look in the bag, and see what's there.



Let's look closer...



These kids love each other and it shows. Sometimes you can measure love in glitter alone--look at how sparkly that all is! Look at the pencils, the hearts, the handwritten notes. The kids played games together and ate treats and went home happy.

I hope you find happiness today too.

I love you husband, and kids. Happy Valentine's Day to you! God only knows what I'd be without you...

An Explosion of Paper on My Table

I bought the kids new construction paper the other day so that they could make valentines for their friends in their homeschooling group. They've done this every year and each year the number of kids grows a little bit. So, I have the kids start on their valentines a few days in advance because they will get soooo tired doing it. Everyone should have problems such as these.

If you saw my kitchen table now, you would see red and purple and blue and white and pink scraps all jumbled together and spilling over the edge onto the floor. Pretty, but messy.

I have to do my part and make cookies which we'll bring to the party later today. The kids will all decorate bags to put on the gym floor to deliver each other their valentines. Everyone will eat too much sugary, baked treats and candy. My kids will bring their valentines home and add them to the others from previous years which they will look at for a few minutes. I will find little bits of paper on the floor hiding underneath the table legs or behind the cabinet somewhere weeks from now...

Homeschooling is fun.

What was that question about socialization again?

They Made it to around 11:00...Happy New Year!

We have been watching Myth Busters, the Zula Patrol and Gigi. My kids couldn't make it to midnight, and frankly it will be the first time in a long time that my husband and I have.

My son cried that he had a headache, so I helped him to bed and he told me not to wake him at 12:00. Poor kid. My daughter insisted that she was OK and then fell asleep with her head in my lap not 10 minutes past when her brother gratefully was led up to bed. My kids are morning people, there's no getting around that even on New Year's Eve.

When the kids were little, we would toast Happy New Year at midnight in Iceland and then they would go to bed at around their usual time. They were perfectly happy with that arrangement. These days, they have such a great sense of pride and big-kidness that they really tried as hard as they could to make it to the big one two. Not this year...

My husband is now channel surfing and I'm writing this to you.

Any new year resolutions? Any regrets about the last year? (But, don't dwell--that doesn't do anyone any good) Any hopes for the new?

Me? I am going to revise The Compact. I will talk more about it in the coming days. There's a lot to do and just blogging about it doesn't sit that well with me lately. I think it's good to get the word out about the "issues" *I'm doing that air quote thing with my hands*. But, words aren't going to cut it. We need action!! That's where I get stuck...What am I supposed to do? What can I do? Aha! What can I do?! That's it! Eureka! I will do what I can do!! And so will you--and then we will quit kidding ourselves that it's a lot when what's needed is so much more. That's where we can all concentrate--somehow. Hmmm.

Any way--Happy New Year! Do you realize that on January 20th of this new year, Barack Obama will be sworn in as our 44th president? How amazing is that? Also, the 19th will be George Bush's last full day of "work" *I'm doing that air quote thing again with my hands* Don't take any office supplies on the way out there Georgie. Heck of a job, George. Heck of a job...

Happy New Year! See you in 2009. God, doesn't that sound ridiculous?! I still remember Match Game '75--that sounds more reasonable to me...

A Sandwich for Santa (for Adult Eyes Only...)

When my kids were little, they knew that Santa was real and that he loved them and gave them wonderful things in their stockings. One time he even gave my little son a homemade man made out of yarn that I had tried to make a couple of weeks previously. My son noticed the difference in the quality between my lame attempt and the obvious superior craftsmanship of Santa's elves displayed in the red yarn man in my son's stocking. Those elves know what they're doing because they are a part of Santa's team. Mom just really couldn't compare with that--no offense to me, but magic is magic and mom is a mere mortal. Everyone knows that.

My kids also knew that Santa is not everywhere. There is only one Santa. Others may believe what they will, but this is what my kids knew.

So, when we would see a Santa ringing the bell asking for donations for the Salvation Army, my kids knew, as they dropped a few coins into the kettle, that that was only a man dressed up as Santa. He wasn't the real Santa. Santa is not walking around Very-Republican-Town, Illinois. He's up at the North Pole getting ready for Christmas Eve. He is exhausted and excited having the elves make all of the toys for the boys and girls all over the world. He is also not at Woodfield Mall in Schaumburg. We may have seen him there, but you know it's not him because you can tell that that guy is wearing a fake beard--it's so obvious. That Santa is there just so kids can get their pictures taken with him. It's just a photo op.

The Santa at Randhurst Mall, however, is real. While it's a very busy time at the North Pole, yes certainly it is, still, Santa wants to take a picture with whoever would like to actually meet him. And we know he's the real Santa because his beard is REAL. That's not fake and you can tell. This guy isn't the Woodfield wannabe, this is REALLY SANTA!! OH MY GOD!! How exciting is it to actually meet the magical man who has given joy to millions of children around the world for hundres of years?!

My kids went to Randhurst Mall and met Santa three years in a row. The third year there was some discussion, on the way home, that maybe he looked a little different than the previous two years. We had the photos to look at, and yes, maybe he looks a little different now, but maybe Santa ages in a magical way too. You never can fully figure out magic. Who are we to try and describe, define, quantify and limit the magic of Santa?

We have always left Santa cookies, milk and a note from the kids. Not only that, but we also always threw carrots up on the roof above our front door for a snack for the reindeer--they need sustenance too, we thought. My kids always excitedly looked to see Christmas morning that Santa had eaten the cookies and drank the milk--on the plate were a few crumbs and a couple of sips of milk were left in the glass. Outside, my kids could see shreds and chunks of carrot on the ground that the reindeer had dropped as they chomped up their snack. The physical evidence of the visit was overwhelming.

It was thrilling for the kids to talk to Santa. I liked to talk to him too. He was a nice man with a slightly sad, but mischievous look in his eyes. The third time we saw Santa, we chatted about various Christmasy things--Did we have a pretty Christmas tree up yet? Were we hoping for a snowy Christmas? Was Santa tired from all of the toy building? Were the reindeer ready to go? Did we always leave Santa a snack?

"Oh yes!" I said. "We always leave you cookies and milk." Santa looked at me for a moment and then said that he would prefer "A sandwich and some cocoa." Pause. Blink, blink. I looked into Santa's eyes and said, "Wouldn't you prefer what we always leave you--aren't you sure you'd rather have cookies and milk?" "Nope!" Santa said robustly with a smile. "I'd like a sandwich and cocoa!" He sat there grinning at me under his beard. I looked at him. The kids looked back and forth at him and me with their open, trusting, innocent eyes.

Damn.

That Christmas we left the carrots on the roof for the reindeer. The next morning there were shreds and chunks scattered all over the ground. We were going to try to leave Santa some cookies and milk, but the kids remembered what he had said, and they knew he would prefer a sandwich and a cup of cocoa. So, I made cocoa and poured it into a cup and I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich--just a light snack for the guy. The next morning there were sandwich crusts on the plate and a few sips of cocoa left in the mug. Santa had come!!

The next year we didn't visit Santa at Randhurst Mall--we were too busy and we somehow never managed to get ourselves over there. The kids reminded me that he wanted a sandwich and cocoa, but I said that I thought it was probably just that one time. I knew he would want the cookies and milk again and wouldn't want me to go to all the trouble of making a sandwich and making homemade cocoa. He knew I had things to do to get ready for Christmas the next day. Santa was considerate and thoughtful like that.

When the kids woke up that Christmas, the plate had cookie crumbs and the glass had a couple of sips of milk left. Santa had come and all was right with the world. He even left a thank you note for the cookies and he hadn't missed the sandwich at all...

Halloween Revisited--the Horror...

I never posted these photos. Around Halloween, I was so excited about the upcoming election and frankly, the view we were greeted with that night...I shudder thinking about it. It was horrific. I've never seen anything like it in my life.

Earlier in the day, we carved pumpkins. Our tradition is that the kids sketch out what they might like, they fiddle around with their designs, and then they draw the final design on their pumpkin and my husband helps them carve them.

Here is my daughter's jack-o-lantern. Pretty scary, no? She did a good job.

The kids dig out the guts, and then the design begins to take form as my husband cuts into the pumpkins. Little did we know the menace that awaited us all...

I took my son to his play and my husband took my daughter to be with some of her friends to go trick-or-treating. We all had no idea what we would see on our front step when we got back. Thankfully, I had the presence of mind to photograph it. I still don't know what to make of it.

My son's jack-o-lantern was outside on the front step inviting trick or treaters to take candy. It seems that maybe one took some and never got away. Look for yourself.

OH MY GOD!!!


LOOK!! What IS this?!


Who is this?! What happened?!


It ATE him!!!!


OH MY GOD!!! It ATE him!! What do we do?! Dear GOD!! Why????!!

WHY?!?!?!?!?!?

I think you can all agree that it was quite the nightmare we came home to that night.

You know the funny thing about it all? No one was ever reported missing... No one was ever reported as gone...

I just wish I could get the image out of my mind. It's seared there, forever etched in my brain with all of its horror and gruesome reality--I WISH it had only been a nightmare...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy day of thankfulness in the full realization of everything we have. Wow. It's a lot, isn't it?

Here's my personal thankful list:

• Husband. He is my partner, and confidante, and friend. Resident smart-ass too. I get a belly laugh from him almost every day--isn't that amazing? Also, he puts up with my idiosyncrasies--which can't be that easy to do.
• Children. I've heard this before and I think it's true--they are my heart walking around in the world. I didn't know I could love as much as I do before I gave birth to my babies. My son is energetic and feeling and smart and funny and sweet. My daughter is energetic and feeling and smart and funny and sweet. Together, they are a dynamic duo that alternately delight, amaze and stupefy me. I love them!
• Family. These are the people who brought me into the world and showed me how it works and showed me how to care. My Mom and Dad are amazing. I learn from them all of the time. Parents can always be teachers, can't they? My brother and sisters--also showed me about life and continue to be a source of learning for me. Plus, they love me. When my siblings and I get together, we can get each other laughing to the point of tears--silly stuff--explodes the heart, really.
• Friends. Our friends are our second family and they fill our hearts. We learn from them, feel supported by them and enjoy camaraderie that comes in following slightly different paths than the norm. We can all be weirdos together and realize that it's all so normal after all.
  
• Our Cat. Daisy is here and loving and involved with our family. When she's not napping, she's with us, visiting wherever we are. She is affectionate and is aware of our moods--she comforts us after boo-boos or hurt feelings. She is 23 years old (about 104 in human years). Every day she is here is a gift from her.
  
• Our Comfort. I don't have it bad. I have it good. My husband has a good job and we're so grateful he has it and how it allows me to be with the kids and give them lessons and classes and books and museum visits and field trips, etc. We don't have to worry about bills. Others are having a harder time and we know that. It's not easy for lots of people.
• Our Health. We are in good health. We feel comfortable almost all of the time. We sleep easily and have energy. We may get an occasional cold, and then it goes away quickly.
• Good Food. I'm so glad I found the farming cooperative that we get our raw milk from. They are a group of wonderful farming families who produce clean, fresh, whole food. We know our milk from grass-fed cows is nutritious and healthful for us. Lots of people can not find such a source--we're lucky. We can go to any one of several grocery stores and get fresh vegetables and fruits. We have access to organic produce as well as conventional. We know that there are people in depressed, urban areas who have no access to grocery stores--they're not there. So, all they can get is cheap, unhealthy junk food. We're very grateful for our vegetables, and fruit and whole grain bread. It helps us to be healthy and we know that.

What is on your list? What are the things in your life, that if they were taken away from you would be like a nightmare? What's the most important to you?

What are you thankful for?

Better Get on That

A month or so ago, a friend of mine asked me what I was doing for Christmas. "What do you mean?", I asked. I didn't understand the question. What she meant is what am I going to buy, and from where? I hadn't thought about it yet, but she was almost done with all of her shopping--some people are that organized. Isn't that amazing?!

My friend Unnamed admitted that several years she would buy her gifts on Christmas Eve! Her friends would call her up and see if she was headed out, and they'd join her and it would be a fun party shopping at the mall together. I think that this was waaaaay pre-kids. I don't think you could joyfully drag kids around a crowded mall on Christmas Eve and still have anything resembling the feeling of good will towards man. "God bless us all, everyone!" would be replaced with, "Walk faster, jive person in front of me! Do you see that opening in front of you to the left??? Go!!!! Go!!!" as you do a halting stutter step behind him for 50 feet.

Shouting in your head doesn't feel very good, does it?

Any way, if I start looking at used books on line, and get little trinkets at Goodwill here and there, I should be able to pull it off in time for Christmas.

My son has other ideas. He has recently seen a commercial for a remote controlled helicopter that has infrared lasers that temporarily knock out the signal of another helicopter, rendering it disabled. He hasn't quite worked out that you would have to get 2 helicopters in order to have the cool, perfectly executed dog fights that they show. Also, it costs just three easy payments of $29.95. Yeah, son, read that as $90. You can round up the nickel. So, 2 helicopters would cost $180. That's not ever gonna happen. Ever.

My daughter is wanting to add to her collection of Calico Critters. While they are cute, we are still trying to stay to The Compact, even for Christmas. Are there used cuddly critters somewhere? I need to check. There might be.


I would love to get a camera. I have a little point and shoot and I can't control anything. I used to have an Olympus OM I and I manually adjusted the shutter and the f stop and I made some great shots. Then, digital came in and we got a simple camera, and I never touched my nice camera again.

I think I could get a used camera that combines the best of both worlds, and it wouldn't require another one for me to have fun with it. Although, maybe it could have infrared lasers, 'cause that's cool. And, who doesn't want cool?

My husband told me the other day what he would like for Christmas, and then I promptly forgot. I have absolutely no idea. What was it? When you read this, Husband, please tell me again. OK?

What, gentle readers, are you getting for Christmas/Chanukah/Kwanzaa/Winter Solstice/Yule and any other holiday that I have not listed?

You better get on that...

The Monster Mash!

Enjoy this song that I used to sing at the top of my lungs every Halloween. The tradition continues.

Have a Happy Halloween!

Happy 4th Everyone!

Happy Fourth of July everyone!

Happy dare-to-say-no-to-the-oppressive-powers-that-be-and-start-a-revolution-to-form-a
-representative-government-instead day!

Happy fight for what you believe and rally a new nation for your cause day!

Happy fight for justice and truth and independence day!

Happy do what you want because you're in a free country (still) and you can decide how you will live your life day!

Happy understanding our history and our rights day:

The Declaration of Independence of the Thirteen Colonies
In CONGRESS, July 4, 1776

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. --That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. —Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain [George III] is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.

He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people, and eat out their substance.

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the consent of our legislatures.

He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us, in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty and perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by the Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

The signers of the Declaration represented the new states as follows:

New Hampshire

Josiah Bartlett, William Whipple, Matthew Thornton

Massachusetts

John Hancock, Samuel Adams, John Adams, Robert Treat Paine, Elbridge Gerry

Rhode Island

Stephen Hopkins, William Ellery

Connecticut

Roger Sherman, Samuel Huntington, William Williams, Oliver Wolcott

New York

William Floyd, Philip Livingston, Francis Lewis, Lewis Morris

New Jersey

Richard Stockton, John Witherspoon, Francis Hopkinson, John Hart, Abraham Clark

Pennsylvania

Robert Morris, Benjamin Rush, Benjamin Franklin, John Morton, George Clymer, James Smith, George Taylor, James Wilson, George Ross

Delaware

Caesar Rodney, George Read, Thomas McKean

Maryland

Samuel Chase, William Paca, Thomas Stone, Charles Carroll of Carrollton

Virginia

George Wythe, Richard Henry Lee, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Harrison, Thomas Nelson, Jr., Francis Lightfoot Lee, Carter Braxton

North Carolina

William Hooper, Joseph Hewes, John Penn

South Carolina

Edward Rutledge, Thomas Heyward, Jr., Thomas Lynch, Jr., Arthur Middleton

Georgia

Button Gwinnett, Lyman Hall, George Walton

And then later, in the Constitution, we had these rights specifically guaranteed:

Bill of Rights

Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

Amendment II

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

Amendment III

No soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.

Amendment IV

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Amendment V

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a grand jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the militia, when in actual service in time of war or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

Amendment VI

In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defense.

Amendment VII

In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise reexamined in any court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.

Amendment VIII

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

Amendment IX

The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

Amendment X

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.

Happy 4th!

Here's to Freedom...

Hillary Didn't Support NAFTA...Uh, Yes She Did

I don't even know what NAFTA is. Is it some way for me to get really cheap things that I don't need? Oh. That's OK then.

Any way, Hillary says that she never supported NAFTA, but it seems there is video showing that she did. Whatever!!

If it's a way for us all to get the things we need and want, then what's the big deal?!

God! Just lighten up, people!

Ooooh! Pretty rings. Look--shiny!

Obama and Clinton Get Along

Look. I don't know what all of the fuss is about. I'm not very poilitical. I don't get that stuff--it's BORING!! All I know is I saw this youtube video of Obama and Clinton dancing together.

How angry can they be with one another?

What Were We Thinking?!

What were we thinking?! NOT buy anything new for a YEAR??!! That's crazy!

We were pulling all of your legs. It was a joke. God, you guys fell hard for that! Of course we're buying new stuff! Why wouldn't we? Seriously. Who in their right mind would deny themselves things ever? If you can get it--why wouldn't you?

We always buy this. It's a Ford Excursion. Every year we just go get a new one.

And this, our wii system. See our hands holding the remotes? We play with these all of the time. Well, we alternate between this and our other game systems--we have 5 of them.

And we especially appreciate these. We love our iPods and always want the newest colors--they're so pretty! We just throw them out when we want a new color. Hey, why not?!

And, I can't live without these. Dooney & Bourke (for Spring or with pastels--so feminine), or Michael Kors. I love those purses with my Hudson Jeans. I am hawt!

Really, it was all just a joke. Of course people in San Francisco stopped buying new things for a year--fruitcakes! What's new there? I just wanted to see people's reaction to such an insane idea.

You know what everyone needs to do? Just chill and relax and do whatever feels good for you. Life is short! Why worry about climate change (if there even is such a thing...), or the war in Iraq? I'm sure the powers that be know what they're doing--they've studied all of this stuff, I haven't. They're the experts. Why worry about stuff that I can't change and have no impact on?

The best we can do is just try to get as much stuff for ourselves and not worry too much about each other. Even poor people can afford things from Walmart--what's the problem?! If it makes ME happy, isn't that enough? I mean, then I'm one more happy person in the world and that helps everyone right? That doesn't sound selfish does it? Besides, what has everyone else ever done for me? Hmmmmm? None of this thinking is selfish.

I'll explain it to you this way. Here's my Story of Stuff:

• An American company goes into a third world country (If they're not even first--why do we care? Don't you like winners?) and gives those people JOBS! You know what they do before American companies get there? Nothing. They don't even know how to extract every last crumb of mineral deposits out of their ground. Now, when American companies get there, they can eat our modern food--not that disgusting swill they've lived on for millennia. COKE is everywhere and thank God for that! That's a blessing to the world!!
• The American company goes to China and gets really cheap labor, or slave labor from prisoners (But I say if they're in prison, they must have done something wrong--right? Slave labor in prison is OK!). They put together all of the cool stuff that we can buy here for a reasonable price! See? It's all good.
• Walmart employs lots of people all over this country. We go there and get stuff and then bring it home and enjoy it...for a while. Then we throw it out and go get more! If we didn't do that, wouldn't the Walmart employees lose their jobs? What about the work force in China? They can't be doing much in prisons if they don't have a job. What about the people in third world countries? Don't they count? We need to buy and then throw out and then buy again. That's how our economy works and that's going great isn't it? There are no glitches in that, right?
  
• If I'm really cool, I get really expensive things that I can't afford but that reinforce the ideas about what it means to be: a sexy, hawt, fabulous woman, a virile, successful man, a cool kid. We need these things. We DESERVE these things. My family deserves their happiness. These things will make us happy. Who is anyone else to judge what will make us happy?

See the ads over there, at the top of my blog? They pay me to run them here. That's a good thing. Why wouldn't I want to make money here? What would be the possible point of making all of these posts? Really, I don't get it. People only do things for money. That's what makes the world go round. Why would I sit here writing things for no reason? If I'm not getting paid, what's the reason then? I'm not tracking on that, really.

Go buy stuff today. Buy a bunch of stuff. Even better--go buy stuff and throw out stuff. When you go shopping for food, make sure you get the most over packaged excessive stuff. Go get a designer purse. Sometimes they cost thousands, but sometimes they're only a few hundred--it's a great deal. Go get a purse from these designers: Burberry, Chanel, Cole Haan, Dolce & Gabbana, Dooney & Bourke, Fendi, Hermes, Michael Kors, Prada or Yves Saint Laurent. Think how fierce that would be! Snap!!

I just thought you guys should know this April 1st, April Fools Day, that we think everyone should buy lots--all of the time. You can expect ads here from now on and maybe a feature or two on how to turn off all of the brain chatter--relax! Go have a bath. Tomorrow I'll show you all of the things I bought last weekend. It was fabulous.

Happy shopping on this April Fools Day today!

Do You Realize That Life Goes Fast?

Do you realize that life goes fast and it's Valentine's Day?

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Go tell the people you love that you love them right now. Now. No, really, go. I'll wait.






















































Did you go tell them? Did you tell them that you love them and that you'd be lost without them and that they've changed your life forever and that they make you feel most fully yourself and that you love that you can just be around them? Did you hold their face in your hands and kiss them and hold them and tell them that you're so glad you're with them and that you admire them and respect them and think they're one of the very best people you know on this earth? Did you?? No. OK, go. I'll wait.




















































Did you tell them now? Good. Finally!!

Now, do you realize that you have the most beautiful face? You do. Really. (The secret is everyone does...) It's one of the first things that attracted your love to you. You're beautiful. Go look in a mirror and see for yourself. Go. I'll wait.




























See?

Happy Valentine's Day! Now, go tell those you love that you love them. Go tell them that they're beautiful. Do you realize that life goes fast? Go. I'll wait...